The Baldheaded Gorilla
It has been said that if one million monkeys with typewriters could write literature that would rival Shakespeare's.
In 2003, the Plymouth University hired 6 monkeys to write for a month. This cost them 2,000 pounds (around 2,700 dollars), and they received 5 pages of "ssssssssss."
My salary would be a little higher than that but the quality would be a lot higher.
I even clean up after myself, unlike the opposition.